WHATEVER FATE DECREES

CLICK TO ENLARGE. ngayon ang 13th anniversary ng kasal namin ni jet. ang bilis talaga ng panahon, parang kailang lang nagsisimula lang kami. isa sa mga paborito kong kanta ni john lennon ang “grow old with me“. simple lang ito na love song at ang unang dalawang linya ay galing sa tula ni robert browning na “rabbi ben ezra“. bakit ko ba ito nabanggit? nagsesenti lang ako. ngayon kasi ang 13th anniversary ng kasal namin ni jet. ang tagal na nga pala namin ano? almost double the seven year itch. pero parang kailan lang. nagsimula kami, supot pa ako pareho kaming struggling na college graduates at pilit na pinapagkasya ang maliit na kita. ngayon, nakabili na kami ng sariling bahay (pulipeyd!) at saka tuli na ako.

di pa nga kami nakasal sa simbahan hanggang ngayon. di na namin ito napapagusapan ni jet lately, pero alam ko, gusto niya ng church wedding. ako naman, di na masyadong naniniwala sa aking nakagisnan na religion at diyos. pero kung hilingin niya eh di ibibigay ko ang hilig. kung nabasa nyo yung mga kwento sa aming website, alam nyo na sa munisipyo lang kami ng kalookan ikinasal. wala kasi kaming pera during that time. sa jollibee lang kami nag reception dalawa. pati nga yung mga witness kong kaibigan, pinauwi ko na lang dahil wala akong ipakain sa kanila. hehe.

wala rin kaming singsing. anong magagawa ko eh wala naman talagang pambili. hanggang ngayon wala akong singsing sa kamay. sa ilong sana ano, parang doon sa “the owl and the pussycat“. but seriously, perhaps the absence of the ring to this day is my way of showing that we’ve done well in spite of the lack of resources. duriing our wedding, wala rin kaming nga parents at kamag-anak na dumalo. basta sinabi na lang namin sa kanila na ikakasal kami on this day and that was it. di naman sila nag offer na gastosan ang kasal namin. at kung nag offer man sila, baka tanggihan ko rin.

early on, alam na namin na di kami magkaka-anak. pero what the heck, basta mayrong taong nagmamahal, nagpapaligaya at nagpapatawa sa akin. sapat na iyon. i know we have more than enough to sustain us.

what’s the secret of still being happy together after 13 years? i don’t really know and i probably can’t explain it well enough. pero pag pinilit mo ako, i’d say, it’s the little things. it’s the small gestures that reconfirm the relationship. it’s the terrific sex, but i won’t get into that for personal reasons. hehe. it’s a bit shallow, but it’s also the way jet laughs at my corny jokes. if you’ve ever heard my wife laugh, you’ll know why. it’s the humor and the private jokes. it’s the goodbye kiss everyday before i leave for work. it’s the phone calls at unexpected times. it’s the history of all those 13 years, of starting together when we were still poor, building our home from scratch and finding our place in this world.

i hope we grow our love even more as we age. i don’t have any ideals on how a marriage should be, nor do i have expectations on how my wife should contribute to our relationship – financially, emotionally or otherwise. i take everything at face value and don’t look much on the shortcomings. bottom line: i’m happy enough as it is that i have someone to grow old with.

happy anniversary mylabopmayn. pakinggan mo ang kanta kong ito para sa iyo. lab U!

56 thoughts on “WHATEVER FATE DECREES

  1. Happy anniversary! A little piece of advice coming from an old man. While I share with your sentiments about religion and church weddings (kapirasong papel lang yan) come to think about it, you know that Jet wants it. Why don’t you give it now that you are well off?

    During the Tuck and Patti concert, while they were singing their version of “Like a Lover”, someone knelt in front of his date and proposed marriage. Daming kinilig.

    I know deep inside, you are a hopeless romantic like myself. Buy a ring and propose and make her cry in happiness. 😉

    Should you heed my advice, dito mo sa Manila gawin at ng makahigop naman ako ng sabaw. Matagal nang hindi namamantikaan ang bibig ko e.

  2. This is so sweet. I wish you and your wife the best, I may not know you, but through your stories, I feel I know both of you very well. And it’s very heartwarming to know that in the face of all the hate in the world, the poverty and all the other problems that do not make life any easier, there are lucky people like you who have found their soulmates to go through the highs and lows with. Happy anniversary!

  3. happy A sa inyong dalawa! di ba ganun daw talaga ang tru lab– when you can’t pinpoint what it really is that keeps you together. x-factor kumbaga. o sya, honeymoon ulit!

  4. bosing, langya naman tong entry mo, nasira tuloy ang eye makeup ko sa pag-iyak. shet, baka magmukha akong drag queen nito mamaya sa klase.

    masasabi ko lang sa inyo ni jet, marami kayong naiinspire na tao, mapa-single man o may asawa gawa sa mga post ninyo. sana kami rin ni P, tumagal din tulad ninyo.

    sana dumating ang araw na marinig ko ng live ang halakhak ni jet.
    happy anniv sa inyo!!!

  5. sabi ko na nga ba.. (parang kanta ni dina bonnevie, ano? hehe) your story reminded me of that of my uncle’s. they didn’t have kids (dahil may problem si uncle) pero lam mo now that they’re much older, nearing 70s na ha, they’re still very sweet to each other. pareho kayo ni uncle, sweet sa wife and mahilig din magpatawa.

    here’s to more wedding anniversaries to you and jet! 🙂

  6. sa mga naka-alala, maraming salamat sa pagdaan dito at sa mga pagbati. uwi na ako ulit sa thursday, bawi na lang ako kay jet pagkita namin sa manila.

  7. anniv nyo pa lang dito sa cali kaya ngayon pa lang ako mag-ha-happy anniv sa inyo!

    i had witnessed how much you cared for one another. I had seen how you supported each other’s goals and aspirations – no matter how difficult it might be. I know how much you took care of each other’s little things.

    May you continue to inspire others to love and hold on to their relationships – thru thich or thin.

    Love you both!

  8. jay and jet, HAPPY 13TH WEDDING ANNIV!!! Im so happy for both of you, I wish matuloy Church Wedding nyo, it doesn’t matter when pero maganda yung makasal din kayo sa church, seguradong maiiyak nyan si jet sabay bigay ng ring, wow:) I wish you all the happiness you both deserved!!!

  9. nick

    happy wedding aniv. oo nga pala magkasunod lang pala yong bday ni jet at ng mrs ko. capricorn din pala si jet ..saludo ako sa mga capricornian….kanina nga pala nasa toronto intl airport ako me nakita akong pinoy …kahawig mo…anyway to you and jet ….wishing you all the best of everything

  10. jeez… nobody has called me nick in a long time. you probably must be some long lost classmate from elementary and high school.

    salamat sa bati. oo sa january ang b-day ni jet. nag bakasyon nga kami sa california ng sandali. baka ako nga yung nasa toronto airport. hehe. or some evil twin.

    teka lang, nadidisorient ako. sino ka ba? hehehe.

  11. una… sayang, it seems we can’t get that seafood fest we should have gotten while you guys are back here in Pinas..

    second… congrats for lasting as long and living together as richly and inspired and blessed 🙂

    third… happy bday k mommy mo!!!

  12. fafah batjay, hapy anniv sa inyo ni mama jet! grabeh, ang sweet naman ng story ninyo. 😀 here’s to more blissful years of togetherness! 😀

  13. huli man daw greeting ko, well-meant pa rin!!!

    i wish you both continued happiness and joy as you grow old together…. 🙂 sana nagbloblog ka pa rin nun 20 years hence… hehehe!!!

    ingat po!

  14. Uy, happy anniversary po sa inyo ni ate Jet! sana kami rin ganyan pa rin ka sweet pagdating ng aming 13th anniversary. Ang symbol daw ng year na ‘to eh lace. Hope you celebrated it with lots of…lace. hehehe.

  15. kuyang, mukhang serious ang dating mo ngayon ah? napa-inggles ka sa araw na ito. makasaysayan pala ang may 25 sa atin. bday rin yan ng tatay ko pero may iba akong alay sa kanya. happy anniversary sa inyong dalawa. sana kuyang, matupad na ang hiling ko dati pa, yung hinihingi kong xerox copy mo, wala pa ba? nye!

    eh kuyang, para saan pa ang singsing kung yung iba ngang may singsing nung kinakasala, matapos ang isa o dalawang taon, wala na at magkahiwalay na. nasa sa tao na ang totoong wagas na pagmamahal.

    si ditse, nawawala pa rin. ditse!! bumaba ka na sa langit! mag-post ka na ha? sobrang tagal na ang bakasyon mo.

    congrats to both of you. nawa’y abutin pa kayo ng golden anniversary.

  16. Everytime I watch a movie or read some stories about everlasting and true love…I feel happy at the same time sad. Happy because true love really conquers all…sad because nowadays rare are those who have the chance to find their true and everlasting love as you and your wife.

    Praying that God would bless you both always and keep your love grows more. So that you may continue to inspire people to still believe in the true essence of love. =)

  17. FAFA!! Pagaling ka ha.

    I’m praying for your speedy recovery. At least naagapan ang appendicitis mo at hindi na lumalala pa ang situation. Pagaling ka agad… malungkot si Ateng kapag may sakit ka 🙂

  18. Nasang ospital ka, pareng BatJay? Get well soon! Simple lang naman yang appendectomy; parang tuli din. Sori nalaman ko lang sa Pusa kasi kaw ang blog nya ngayon.

    Belated HAPPY ANNIV din sayo ng twinflame mo. Keep her, hold her, love her always. And yes, ask her to marry you in Church. That would be like nanliligaw ka ulet. I think the key to successful marriages is feeling like its DAY ONE always, dba?

    Pagaling ka…para makapag-post ka ulet.

  19. Ang sweet…. happy anniversary sa inyo ni Jet.

    Kami,nag-12th year anniversary last december. Nagpakasal kami sa simbahan kakapilit ng (magiging) biyenan ko. Ang plano namin, imbitahin yung judge sa bahay (marami kakilala na judge kasi judge nanay ko he he) tapos naka-blue jeans kami. Kulit lang kasi ng biyenan ko. Kung hindi lang ako nagpapalakas sa kanya noon, sana pinanindigan na namin na sa bahay na lang.

    Nga pala, sa Kalookan kayo nagpakasal 13 years ago? Di kaya nanay ko nagkasal sa inyo? MTC ba o RTC?

    Nabalitaan ko kay Pusa na na-operahan ka raw. Apendicitis? Sana ay mabuti na ang pakiramdam mo.

  20. nakow! kaya pala nawawala kayo pareho ni ditseng jet ay nasa boarding house pala kayo ng St. Luke’s. kuyang! sabihin mo sa doctor, bikini cut ang gawin para nakatago ang hiwa mo ha?

    baka napasobra ang mga pinuntahan nyong kainan kaya pumutok na yan.

    well.. kidding aside, get well soon, kuyang pinsan! ditse, don’t worry too much. kaya yan ni kuyang!

  21. haynako. ilang ulit ko binasa tong post na ito (3 beses sa isang araw ata) ngunit ngayon lang ako nakapag comment. feeling ko ramdam na ramdam ko ang kasayahan, pighati, dalamhati, tuwa (di lamang sa pagkakatuli) at lahat na ata ng emosyon sa mga nabase ko.

    itong nakaraang 2 linggong ito ay isa lang pagpapatunay na malakas ang pagmamahal niyo sa isat isa, 13 taon at 60 pang dadating, kakayanin niyo yan.

    happy anniversary, di man tayo nagkita dito sa Pinas, ok na muna, sa ibang paraan at sa ibang panahon malamang.

    salamat sa mga teks. ingat ka chong nick. sabi naman sa iyo ng nanay mo, wag magtatalon at magsasayaw pagkatapos kumain, ayan tuloy…

  22. naku, nagkasakit ka pala fafah batjay. get well soon! sa St. Luke’s ka pala? Second home ko na yan, nanjan ako 2x a week. Sana nakita ko kayo ni mama Jet. ingat kayo lagi 🙂

  23. naku sick ka pala manong! magpagaling ka.

    maraming beses ko na nasabi to pero sasabihin ko ulit. swerte kayong dalawa sa isa’t isa at nananatili ang aking paniniwala na matanda na ako, eh magkasama pa rin kayo. (bata pa kasi ako ngayon eh. hehehe)

    pagaling pagaling pagaling.

    hi jet!

    p.s. talo ko sila lahat. sobrang late ang comment ko.

  24. ay, get well, ser batjay! uuwi na ang fafa ko today from jafan. set na yung church wedding! hihi, wala lang, share-share lang ba.

    get well ser! kakamiss po blogs nyo!

  25. ayan, tulad ng sinasabi ko ke Mama Jet, mortal lang kayo… pede ring magkasakit 🙂

    buti na lang nde pa ganun ka-super major… and am sure naman nga you’ll persevere over this operation…

    pero remind-remind ko lang… let’s put the emphasis on GROW OLD WITH ME… sa GROW and sa OLD…. so to all of us with loved ones, let’s take better care of each other, and stricter care of our loved ones 🙂

    ahihi… kaka-miss kayo!!!!

  26. hey jay you made me cry with this post. i know you wrote it a year ago, and just before your appendix (that ever historic one) broke. i don’t know why and how i know you and jet today… i believe there is a special reason for making our lives touch. and when i witness your love for each other, it has a way of lighting up the darkest places where no smile can thrive.

    i have to second (or third) rolly and emer’s entreaty to you… you know she wants it — for the love of jet, you will do it. but as the saying goes, you will know in the perfect time. i haven’t forgotten what you told me about your wedding specs… i hold you to that!!! i will be there come hell or high water.

    thank you for the story of your love. my throat is really constricted now. 🙂

  27. Hello.
    Wala lang ako magawa sa bahay kaya naisipan kong pumunta sa internetshop tapos nagsearch ng kung anu-ano at nakita ko tong story nyo. Di tayo magkakilala pero feeling ko pareho tayong hopeless romantic. Kakainggit naman kayo ni Jet at syempre lucky girl naman nya inggit ako sa totoo lang. I just broke up with my boyfriend,imagine wala man lang anniversary o special ocassion na pwedeng iselebreyt kahit sana kahit itext lang di na nga ako ask ng date o anuman, greet lang sana okay na ako eh, pero wala.Ako naman okay lang nun kasi baka di lang talaga sya ganun. One year and three months din kami. Kaya sana madami pang tulad nyo sa tabi tabi.

  28. hi irene.

    thanks for the comment. oo hopeless romantic kami ni jet. malapit na pala kaming mag 15 years na mag-asawa. that’s more than a lifetime for some relationships. sa amin, pakiramdam ko eh developing pa rin. di pa naman kami nagsasawa sa isa’t isa and actually – mawawala na ako kung di ko siya kasama. di lang dahil hindi ko alam kung saan nakalagay ang mga fresh towels sa bahay. mawawala sa akin ang aking true north. siya kasi nagbibigay ng kaunting direksyon sa buhay ko.

    sana, makita mo rin ang iyong trulab. ingat at good luck sa iyo.

    jay

  29. wow! nakaka inspire naman yun! hehe more power to you bat jay and bat jet ahehe ^_^ sana one day magka baby kayo para may pagmanahan ng humor ninyo ^_^ KUDOZ! great couple!

  30. grabe true love tlg…touch ako…how i wish gnyan din ang love story nmin ng pinakamamahal ka..pero malayo kmi now…pero sb nya papalapit n dw…hayy love love love tlg…! thank u inspiring n kwento ha…lalo akong nainlove sa carlo ko…tc!

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